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Let’s go nuts

I’m gonna write about my realtionship to nuts (the edible ones).

At the age of 3 I was at birthday party. Mom gave me a piece of chocolate, which I of course ate, but later I vomited under a table. After a while they found out I was allergic to nuts. 12 years have passed, and last week I was at hospital doing a new test. I’m now allowed to eat all nuts except peanuts. Of course I got really happy and went straight to the store to buy me some. The problem is that I can’t eat them. I can in theory, nothing will happen, but my mind stops me. Having a piece of chocolate with nuts in front of me right now, I’ve tried to eat it so many times and failed exactly as many. My body have registred an automatic fear of eating those things, it’s almost impossible breaking the fear.

All this makes me think about criminals. Nuts could possibly kill me before, and now I’m supposed to accept eating them. Criminals change, just as my immune system, and I think I’ve started to realise why forgiving someone who’s committed a severe crime can be so hard. The nuts could kill me before, what makes them unable to do so now?

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